Nope

Today's pre-school report:

(*Names have been changed to protect the innocent. Or not so innocent. I'm still not sure which is which.)

Me: How was your day?

Sam: Fun

Me: What did you learn today?

Sam: Shoot guns

Me: ...oh. ok. who taught you that?

Sam: Timmy*

Me: Ok... What else did you learn?

Sam: My teachers.

Me: Your teachers?

Sam: No, my teachers.

Me: What did you learn about your teachers?

Sam: NO MY TEACHERS!!

Me: ... your teachers?...

Sam: yes

(long pause)

Sam: I wurn der names.

Me: Oh neat. What are their names?

Sam: Jessi

Me: Your teacher's not named Jessi, silly!

Sam: Whats her names?

Me: Miss Leigh and Miss Becky

Sam: oh. I wike dem.

Me: Thats good.

(another long pause)

Me: Did anybody get in trouble?

Sam: Yes

Me: who?

Sam: John and Timmy*

Me: why did they get in trouble?

Sam: time out

Me: they went to time out?

Sam: yes

Me: why?

Sam: dey in twubble

Me: what did they do to get in trouble?

Sam: hitting

Me: who hit?

Sam: John hit Timmy

Me: why did John hit Timmy?

Sam: wif a hammer

Me: John hit Timmy with a hammer??

Sam: no, John not hit Timmy with a hammer

Me: ok... did you get in trouble?

Sam: no

Me: that's good. i'm proud of you.

Sam: yeah... ... John went to time out chair.

Me: he went to the time out chair for hitting Timmy?

Sam: no

Me: why did he go to the timeout chair?

Sam: cuz

Me: cause why?

Sam: he in twubble

Me: why was he in trouble?

Sam: i hit Timmy.

Me: YOU hit timmy?

Sam: yes. with a hammer.

Me: you hit Timmy with a hammer??

Sam: yes

Me: why did you do that?

Sam: time out chair

Me: you went to the time out chair?

Sam: no. John in da time out chair.

Me: ok... so did you hit anybody?

Sam: yes

Me: who?

Sam: Timmy

Me: Sam, we don't hit our friends. Thats not nice. Why did you hit him?

Sam: cuz

Me: cause WHY?

Sam: CUZ

Me: did you get in trouble?

Sam: nope